They Followed Doctors Orders

I Heard the Doctor Yelling at Him

‘The nurses were generally kind, and I tried to be kind because I knew they were David’s hope. They followed doctors orders. Food was usually late. The day of the vent, David called, very upset, and I heard the doctor yelling at him. He said it’s your fault that you have to go on the ventilator! If you wouldn’t have gone to the bathroom on your own, you’d be fine! Later in November, I had regular fights with the doctors and was met with a wall of “against hospital protocol”.

David’s vax status was at the top of his chart every day. I was allowed in after two weeks wait period because I also had Covid, but for only one hour a day. I asked for a vitamin drip, sometimes multiple times a day, and was told that that was against hospital protocol. I asked multiple times for ivermectin and again, that was against protocol. David tried to get some stretching done, but was ridiculed and told to return to bed. I visited the day of the vent, and he was getting stronger and his numbers were getting better. I drove the hour and a half home, only to get a call from his doctor, saying that if he refused the vent, he was going to die. I believe they waited for me to leave so they could scare David, and I wasn’t allowed back in until the next day.

David and I farmed and ranched together. In early October, we were sick with Covid, but were recovering. We needed to work calves, which included branding. It was a source of pride for David to always brand his calves, even though he was still sick. In the following days, he continued to get weaker, even though we were self medicating with ivermectin. We were very aware of the hospital situation and wanted to avoid any hospital, but David just was too weak.

The first two weeks of his hospitalization, I wasn’t allowed to see him because I had Covid also. We had discussed remdesivir, but the hospital used their scare tactics and eventually David agreed. They also threatened him with his life when in the middle of the night after my all day visit and he was doing fine, they told him he needed to go on the ventilator.  They called me, and I asked them what other alternatives there were, and the doctor simply said, “heaven!” The doctor told him it was his fault that he needed to be vented, because he went to the bathroom by himself. Otherwise, he’d have been fine.

I figured out early that I had to be nice to the nurses, and not make waves, to keep from having a target on my back. Most nurses and some doctors were kind, but as I watched my soul mate die, every day was a fight with the doctors, one he ultimately lost. I was allowed to be in the room with him for one hour while he was dying, but our two adult children were denied the right to say goodbye to their father. They will never get over that. None of us will.

David was a pillar in our community, on the school board, and other organizations, and was very well thought of, and respected. The large high school gym was filled with people during his visitation and funeral. My children and I are trying our best to keep our farm running and productive, but we desperately miss our husband and father. We now have a beautiful two year old granddaughter that only knows her Papa through photos.

David was a very active, engaged and loved member of our community. His funeral was held in our gymnasium, where David helped with high school volleyball and reffed wrestling. David served as a school board member for eight years and was on two different fair boards for many years. His death left a huge hole in the community. The gym was filled with shocked mourners who all want justice for David.

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